One immigrant’s perspective

 

How often does one hear that in order to change the world, we must change ourselves first. As it is, many aspects of my life seem to be continually changing and evolving. I am a caucasian middle aged and middle class woman living in the United States. Even if I did not want to, I also belong to the sub-group of the immigrants. Being a part of the first group, automatically  implies its many advantages, however, also being an immigrant diminishes that standing. My ethnic identity ties me to the American Polonia. There are many aspects on my nationality that I am proud of, such as: our rich history, traditions, culture and literature. This year Poland celebrated the hundred anniversary of regaining its independence, a remarkable occasion that stirs my thought about patriotism. Yes, I share with other Poles, a deep longing and a desire for that country  with the Vistula River running through it , to preserve our identity, culture and traditions. I am proud of the Polish culture and the acclaimed individuals who made a difference in the world , such as: the astronomer Mikolaj Kopernik, pianist Federyk Chopin, scientist Maria Curie Sklodowska, pope John Paul II and many others. Polish history makes me proud, even if it has dark periods in the lives of our ancestors, such as fighting invasions and oppression. I have to add however, that there are some aspects of the Polish culture that I find embarrassing. Having a “narrow mind” closed to new ideas and forms of diversity, strict adherence to the known traditions and religious views while discounting any outside as not good enough, are examples of that. Some Poles seem judgmental and intolerant while acting “better than you”. Another embarrassing fact that Poles are perceived as heavy drinkers. I hate the phrase “Drink like a Polak” but unfortunately it’s often true. Above all, the most troubling for me is the anti-Semitism which existed throughout Poland’s history, and to a certain extend, still does. I have many Jewish friends and admire their culture.

Living in the USA for over 23 years, has been long enough to stop my tendency to insulate from the American culture and embraced it instead. During that time I established a family, raised a child and feel immersed in the American style life, but never-the-less, there are times when I still feel some isolation and feeling of being the “outsider” or not “belonging” fully in the society. For instance, people reminiscing about their childhoods or old TV show have to take time and explain them. This might seem insignificant, but it’s still a barrier that will exist between myself and most of the people I associate with. One of the gripes regarding the immigrants is that we apparently make no effort to learn the language of our adopted country. It’s doubtful that people who say that have tried to learn the second language, for if they did, they would be  far more forgiving. We are now living in the anti-immigration era, but I don’t feel that it effects me much anymore, however when my accent is acknowledged, even with a polite “how cute” I’m left annoyed by people’s prejudice and lack of understanding.

Being raised in Poland I grew up assimilating many stereotypes. Growing up I heard that without  question, the Russians and the Germans are bad people-they are the enemies. I also heard then that the individuals from the LGBTQ community are sick and beneath the population at large, not worthy of acceptance or respect. Today, my best friend is a gay man, whom I trust and admire. Nowadays, I override my early acquired beliefs and try to treat others as individuals rather than the group they belong to. I strongly believe that as a member of the immigrant Polish women in the USA, I contribute to the richness and diversity of cultures in our country. I experienced various kinds of stress as an immigrant, that impacted my well-being, including the loss of the cultural norms, religious customs and social support system. Adjustment to a new culture, the changes in identity and the concept of self, made me a stronger,  more emphatic person with a broader vision of the society. I try to avoid thinking based on the social stereotypes because I know from experience how painful this stigmatic behavior can be.